Of course I have long known that my name is not the most internationally viable name one can have. The very name of this blog is an evidence of that. But here in Brazil it seems to be even a bigger problem than in other places. People just can not handle it. But as the very kind and polite people they are, they try not to pretend that they have no idea how to pronounce my name and that they just can not remember it.
Today I joined some of my local colleagues for a pilates class. The trainer asked a couple of times for my name, but after the class I found out that in addition to asking me, he had asked one of the colleagues several times what my name is and if I do not have another name. While talking about this, the other colleagues joins in and tell me that other colleagues in the office ask them all the time about my name.
Later, one of the colleagues sent me an e-mail saying I HAVE to come up with a nickname. She had just helped me to make a reservation at a beauty salon and had had a very difficult time getting them to understand my name.
I guess my poor parents had no idea I would live such an international life!
Showing posts with label names. Show all posts
Showing posts with label names. Show all posts
Friday, April 08, 2011
Monday, June 23, 2008
Cultural Confusion
Today I had some cultural considerations. Before we left Kabul I met with the driver who was driving us the last time and he then asked when I would come back to Kabul. I answered I would return on Sunday and leave again on Tuesday. Then he invited me to dinner with his family on Monday evening. I found it very flattering and thanked and agreed. But we never decided on the details, we only changed phone numbers, but did not say who would call who.
At the same time as I am very flattered and happy to be invited and really wanted to meet his family again and hopefully would have some more time to talk to them and hear more about how they live and think, I also felt a bit hesitant. I know it is against all security recommendations to go out alone like that with someone you don’t really know. But I do trust him and I have been there before. But this time it would have been more planned which in a way is riskier and it would also mean movement after dark which normally is recommended to avoid. And I also did not really know how to get there and back. Last time he drove me, but I am not sure whether he has a car of his own and I don’t think he would be able to use the company car in the evening.
Anyway; now when we came back to Kabul I did not know if I should call him or not. I felt that my colleague was not too thrilled about me moving around on my own with an Afghan at night, but I mostly wondered what would be the most culturally acceptable. Was I to call and let him know I was back? Or would that be like inviting myself? Should I just wait and see if he called or would it be pushy and not correct to call an international woman? Was it very rude not to make this invitation happen? I just did not know what to do so I just did not call and neither did he. It is a bit sad; I would really have liked to visit his family again. They all seemed so nice and I even bought a small gift for them in Mazar, but I did just not know what would have been the correct thing to do.
Ok, we had some meeting quite late and after that our other driver took me and my colleague out for a small sightseeing, so I had some other nice things to do, but it would have been such an opportunity to speak to some “normal” Afghans under nice circumstances.
I managed to make some small cultural blunders in the evening as well. While we were having dinner at the Serena some high shot person dressed in the traditional clothes from the Gulf came in. You could tell he was a VIP both from his two body guards and from the way the staff reacted. For one they immediately turned down the rather annoying music (pan-flute versions of Beatles songs!). Then it happened that I went to the dessert buffet at the same time as the VIP and he started talking to me and explaining one of the desserts, what it contained and that it is very common in Egypt. As he repeated Egypt a couple of times I eventually asked if he came from Egypt. Then he told me that he was the ambassador of UAE and pointing to his clothes saying “this you only see in the Gulf”. I felt so stupid. Of cause I know, but it just came across in the wrong way. Later I wanted to tell him that I really liked the dessert and thank him for the recommendation and I asked once more what it was called. Obviously he misunderstood me and thought I asked what his name was and answered “Mohammed”. That made me fell very stupid again as I then did not know whether to introduce myself or just tell him that I was actually more interested in the name of the dessert. I opted for the latter option. After that I thought I’d better stay away and not talk to him more in case his body guards would start to regard me as an annoyance and have me thrown out.
At the same time as I am very flattered and happy to be invited and really wanted to meet his family again and hopefully would have some more time to talk to them and hear more about how they live and think, I also felt a bit hesitant. I know it is against all security recommendations to go out alone like that with someone you don’t really know. But I do trust him and I have been there before. But this time it would have been more planned which in a way is riskier and it would also mean movement after dark which normally is recommended to avoid. And I also did not really know how to get there and back. Last time he drove me, but I am not sure whether he has a car of his own and I don’t think he would be able to use the company car in the evening.
Anyway; now when we came back to Kabul I did not know if I should call him or not. I felt that my colleague was not too thrilled about me moving around on my own with an Afghan at night, but I mostly wondered what would be the most culturally acceptable. Was I to call and let him know I was back? Or would that be like inviting myself? Should I just wait and see if he called or would it be pushy and not correct to call an international woman? Was it very rude not to make this invitation happen? I just did not know what to do so I just did not call and neither did he. It is a bit sad; I would really have liked to visit his family again. They all seemed so nice and I even bought a small gift for them in Mazar, but I did just not know what would have been the correct thing to do.
Ok, we had some meeting quite late and after that our other driver took me and my colleague out for a small sightseeing, so I had some other nice things to do, but it would have been such an opportunity to speak to some “normal” Afghans under nice circumstances.
I managed to make some small cultural blunders in the evening as well. While we were having dinner at the Serena some high shot person dressed in the traditional clothes from the Gulf came in. You could tell he was a VIP both from his two body guards and from the way the staff reacted. For one they immediately turned down the rather annoying music (pan-flute versions of Beatles songs!). Then it happened that I went to the dessert buffet at the same time as the VIP and he started talking to me and explaining one of the desserts, what it contained and that it is very common in Egypt. As he repeated Egypt a couple of times I eventually asked if he came from Egypt. Then he told me that he was the ambassador of UAE and pointing to his clothes saying “this you only see in the Gulf”. I felt so stupid. Of cause I know, but it just came across in the wrong way. Later I wanted to tell him that I really liked the dessert and thank him for the recommendation and I asked once more what it was called. Obviously he misunderstood me and thought I asked what his name was and answered “Mohammed”. That made me fell very stupid again as I then did not know whether to introduce myself or just tell him that I was actually more interested in the name of the dessert. I opted for the latter option. After that I thought I’d better stay away and not talk to him more in case his body guards would start to regard me as an annoyance and have me thrown out.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Über-international
Somethimes you need other peoples comments to get perspectiv on your own life. That happened to me today (actually even twice).
I was telling a friend of mine, that while passing Dubai on the way back from Kabul, I will to try to catch up with a German, who I met on the flight from Stockholm to Milano a couple of weeks ago and who is living in Dubai. My friend then replied by coining a new expression and said that my "über-international" way of life should be able to compensate for the miserable place where I live at the moment. Maybe she is right. I am not sure. But I kind of like the expression.
Über-international.
I was telling a friend of mine, that while passing Dubai on the way back from Kabul, I will to try to catch up with a German, who I met on the flight from Stockholm to Milano a couple of weeks ago and who is living in Dubai. My friend then replied by coining a new expression and said that my "über-international" way of life should be able to compensate for the miserable place where I live at the moment. Maybe she is right. I am not sure. But I kind of like the expression.
Über-international.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Fake or real?
I guess many of you have heard the internet clip with a voice calling out from some British airport, names -fake or real? - that sounds like i.e. "My colleague Just farted and Left the room The bastard". Today I heard someting similar, in real life! I wonder what the poor person who made that call thought. Sitting at Schiphol Airport waiting for my flight I suddenly heard; "Attention please. Passengers Strange and Motherless, travelling to London Heathrow on flight no YY, please immediatly go to gate XX".
Thursday, March 01, 2007
New Name?
Hmmm, I have been thinking whether I should change the name of this blog or not. Somehow it seems less apropriate to call it Travels 06 anymore. But on the other hand, just to upgrade it to 07 isn't too creative either or...? Maybe just Travels? Or maybe just leave it the way it is? Any suggestions?
Tuesday, August 29, 2006
Names
This summer has made me think about names and why we have the names we have. Ok, the answer might be obvious, in most cases we have the names our parents gave us, but why exactly this name? The reason why I have been thinking about it this summer is that I have come upon names that to me seem very unusual and/or funny.
For all the differences between Philippines and Zimbabwe, the two countries have actually more similarities than I would ever have guessed (more on these similarities and differences in a later blog). For example both countries are to a rather big part English speaking, although it is not the “native” language and many have English names, but not only the average John, Mary, Jack and Jill. No, the namnes are much more creative, and the fact that they are in English makes it possible for me to understand them. In both these countries I have met people named things like; Lovely, Precious, Lovemore, Energy, Honest, Prudence, Marvelous and Godwell. That made me wonder if the name has any influence on who we become, or if it is only the hope of our parents that are reflected in the names they give us, and that they might in some cases get very disappointed...
Someone told me, that here in Zimbabwe the name might reflect the situation or feelings at the time of birth of the child. That makes you really wonder what went on the day the Godknows was born. And it makes you kind of feeling sorry for poor Loveless…
I also wonder if we would have been the same persons if we had other names. Both in the Philippines and in Zimbabwe people very often ask you for your name. Ok, if it is someone I know and someone I know I will have more contact to of course I take the time to explain my name, but for some small talk in the taxi or in a line or a shop, I just cannot be bothered making anyone understand my name. And I can assure you that if I would have persisted on giving the staff at Starbuck’s my normal name, I would have had to drink cold coffee the whole time in Manila… So, what I have done is that in situations like that I have used my second name, Susanne, which is much more internationally viable. It is really my second name, so it is not as if I am lying, but that is exactly the way it feels.
The first weekend in Manila I was out travelling together with a Swedish guy I met on the plane to Manila. He had much the same problem, his name is Torben. He also used the same method. He used his second name Michael. So there were not Gudrun and Torben travelling together but Susanne and Michael. Does it matter??
For all the differences between Philippines and Zimbabwe, the two countries have actually more similarities than I would ever have guessed (more on these similarities and differences in a later blog). For example both countries are to a rather big part English speaking, although it is not the “native” language and many have English names, but not only the average John, Mary, Jack and Jill. No, the namnes are much more creative, and the fact that they are in English makes it possible for me to understand them. In both these countries I have met people named things like; Lovely, Precious, Lovemore, Energy, Honest, Prudence, Marvelous and Godwell. That made me wonder if the name has any influence on who we become, or if it is only the hope of our parents that are reflected in the names they give us, and that they might in some cases get very disappointed...
Someone told me, that here in Zimbabwe the name might reflect the situation or feelings at the time of birth of the child. That makes you really wonder what went on the day the Godknows was born. And it makes you kind of feeling sorry for poor Loveless…
I also wonder if we would have been the same persons if we had other names. Both in the Philippines and in Zimbabwe people very often ask you for your name. Ok, if it is someone I know and someone I know I will have more contact to of course I take the time to explain my name, but for some small talk in the taxi or in a line or a shop, I just cannot be bothered making anyone understand my name. And I can assure you that if I would have persisted on giving the staff at Starbuck’s my normal name, I would have had to drink cold coffee the whole time in Manila… So, what I have done is that in situations like that I have used my second name, Susanne, which is much more internationally viable. It is really my second name, so it is not as if I am lying, but that is exactly the way it feels.
The first weekend in Manila I was out travelling together with a Swedish guy I met on the plane to Manila. He had much the same problem, his name is Torben. He also used the same method. He used his second name Michael. So there were not Gudrun and Torben travelling together but Susanne and Michael. Does it matter??
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